Carmels!

When I was little, one very fond memory I have with my Mother was making homemade carmels. She would always make carmels for us to take to school for our birthdays (back when kids were still allowed to take homemade treats), and also all through the holidays.

I remember standing on one of our kitchen chairs next to her at our stove "helping" her make the carmels. I remember one time I dumped an entire glass of water into them, which ruined them. Mom just said that I would at least know why you don't do that for the next batch.

After a while, she started branching out and making her own candies. Toffee, and tons of different chocolates. She had her own little candy business called "Alice's Treats," and even got to the point where she would have her friends over and they would have candy teaching sessions.

A year or two after she passed away, my family went around to all of her close friends' houses to give them a Christmas present and thank them for being there for her and us when she was sick. When we went to Christie Mabey's house, she said she had actually just made a batch of my mom's toffees earlier that day! She gave each of us a BUNCH of it. I was so close to crying, because I never thought I would taste my mom's treats again. Thank you Christie!

Anyway... I've been thinking for a while that I've been wanting to get back into baking and cooking. I figured I would start with baking, since that is what I remember the most clearly from my mother's teachings.

So I decided to try my hand at making the carmels yesterday. I have never attempted it before by myself, and the last time I participated in making them was long before she passed away. Surprisingly enough, I remembered more than I thought I would!

Very simple ingredients.

Also easy supplies.

...plus a thick pot. (my mom's was thicker, but I made due with what I had)

Boil, boil, boil....

Testing to see if it's done!

Pour into a buttered pan, but don't scrape the pot!

Scrape the pot into a separate bowl, so the stuff that is extra cooked doesn't mix with the softer part.

Let cool, cut up and wrap! (I actually ended up using a pizza cutter to cut the strips as I was going. Much easier than the knife.)

Enjoy!

I think they turned out pretty good for my first time by myself! Next projects... Mom's chocolate chip, and oatmeal cookies! MMmmMMMmmm....

A B C

A- Attached or Single: Attached B- Best Friends: Kollin and my Sava. C- Cake or Pie : Grandma Richen's cheesecake...mmm... D- Day of Choice : Whatever day I can spend with my Kollin. E- Essential item : My phone, and of course, Kollin. Can't function without him! F- Favorite Color : Pink... but who doesn't already know that? G- Gummy worms or gummy bears: Bears. Unless they're the sour worms... yum... H- Hometown- Salt Lake City I- Indulgences: Chocolate J- January or July: I guess July. It's warmer, but can be too hot at times. K- Kids: Expecting my first! L- Life is incomplete without: Family, Kollin, Friends and Chloe. M- Marriage Date: TBD N- Number of siblings: 1 brother, 2 sisters, 2 step sisters and 1 step brother. And also a bunch of in-laws. O- Oranges or apples: Apples, even though I'm allergic. P- Phobias: Swallowing pills and throat cultures. Q- Quotes: "Loving the world around you fills your heart with a tender joy." R- Reason to Smile: Feeling my baby roll and kick inside me, and every day when Kollin gets home from work. S- Season: Used to be summer, but now I'm leaning toward fall. T - tag 3 friends: Callie, Anne and Kelley. U- unknown fact about me: Honestly, I can't really think of anything. My life is pretty open now days. V- very favorite store: Hmmm... at this moment in time... Babies R Us. Ha ha! W- worst habit: Clicking my nails. X- xray or ultrasound: Ultrasound! Y- your favorite food: I'm pregnant... I've got too many to list right now. lol Z- zodiac: Libra

We Need a Second Opinion

Yesterday Kollin may have brought up a good point. We were looking at my first ultrasound where it showed the outdoor plumbing for our little gummy bear. Kollin isn't completely convinced it's a boy, and thinks some of the plumbing may be a part of the face. You can kind of see a nose and maybe lips right next to the area. I looked again after this and still think it's a boy... because what else could that be? Since it's kind of off to the side of what we're thinking is the face, I'm not really sure what Kollin is thinking it is. So how about you guys take a look for us here, and give us your opinions of what you think? Stem or no stem? He or she? Phoebe or Phoebo?

Woofety Woof Woof! (Happy Birthday!)

My baby Chloe is 3 years old today! I can't believe how the time has flown by. She has had quite the adventures in her short little life...

Just a little pup.

Then she met her boyfriend, Moo.

And they got busy.

And she had a LOT of kids.

All of this, by the way, was over a year ago, even before she was 2. She was such a good mama.

Since she spent about the first 2 1/2 years being raised with pit bulls, she is quite the little toughie. She was the queen of the house, and let them know it by kicking them off the doggie beds and hogging them to herself. (Still while pregnant too)

Yet, she always finds time to snuggle me when she knows I have needed it. She is such a good dog and can't believe that I was blessed to be her mom! She is such a sweet spirit in my house, and look forward to many more years with her.

Happy Birthday my baby girl! I love you!

Now to see how she reacts to her little brother once he is born.... eek!

HaPpY HaLloWeEN!

Here are some pictures of our activities last night at Area 51. Had a bunch of fun, and saw lots of friends. Hope everyone stayed safe and had fun as well!

Shua, me and Kollin

Another one of my pregnant friends, Anne and me. No one recognized her!

I Can Haz Brains?

Yay! We're Zombies! Just getting into the Halloween Spirit! See what you look like as a Zombie. :)

25 Week Ultrasound

He is definitely bigger than last time! He is now weighing 1 lb. 12 oz. The nurse said that he is measuring big for how far along I am. So I could be either a week and a half further along than we thought, or he just had a growth spurt. I hope he doesn't get too big! I'm not that big of a girl!

Halloween Costume

Ok, so I tried to wait to post any pictures of my costume until Halloween was closer or past. But I am just so excited I couldn't wait!

As you can see, I am going to be a skeleton. We were just going to get a black shirt, but found one almost ready made at Wal-Mart. All we (Kollin) had to add was the baby. He also painted my pants, and the gloves are ones he had already had.

I love this idea that a friend gave me for a maternity Halloween costume, and it also goes perfectly with Area 51, since that is where we will be!

Happy Birthday Mommy

Today is my Mother's birthday. She is 61. She left this world almost 7 years ago. Sometimes it still seems like a bad dream that I will never wake up from. But I know that she is now my guardian angel and keeps me safe.

I love you so much Mom! Happy Birthday! And many more!

Will it Come?

I'm starting to get a little worried about my attitude towards kids right now. I am still very excited for my little boy to get here, and can't wait to be a mother. I have always wanted to be a mom. There was even a point that I had decided to trash that whole idea, and it wasn't going to happen for me. I felt I was too old to be having my first child. I didn't think I had the patience to deal with a whiny, crying, suck the life out of me small person. I am so scared that the whole patience thing will not come to me, and I am going to hate my baby. I thought I was too greedy to want to bring a little one into this world that would be depending completely on me, and I just wouldn't want to deal with it and end up being a dead beat mom. Some of these thoughts are coming back... but oops! Too late! No getting out of it now. Me being so sick through my entire pregnancy hasn't helped with that much either. It makes me wonder if I am going to resent my child for putting me through this crap. I am hoping that it is just the pregnancy hormones talking, but in a way know that it isn't. For a long time even before I was pregnant, unless I was around a perfectly well mannered child or baby, I would get very annoyed and anxious with anything that kid would do. It was always the best birth control back in the day. Now, however, it is scaring the crap out of me. There are things that I just need to keep thinking about, and be sure to remember. My mom turned 30 shortly after my parents adopted me. I'm only one year ahead of that, so the age thing is ok. Also, outside of Utah, this is perfectly normal. Right? Maybe? I have never been a patient person. Just ask my dad. Or Kollin. Or pretty much anyone that has known me for longer than... oh... five minutes? Kollin always tells me about the whole "love at first sight" thing once I see him, and that the patience will come. I always try to remind myself that my Heavenly Father would not dish out anything to me that I could not handle. That my Mother will be watching over me, and make sure I am ok (ok, now I have tears streaming down my face). But I still worry. Then about the whole greed thing. I know I have been quite a greedy person in my life. But there have also been times when I have given all of myself and not thought of what is in it for me? When I think back over time, I think the non-greedy outweigh the greedy. But that may just be me trying to find something good about myself. Anyone else have a different opinion on that? With me being soooo sick (blah), I have known women that have been MUCH more sick than I have been. I just need to remember that at least I am not needing to go to the ER for an IV drip to keep nutrients in me, and am not constantly puking my guts out. Feeling incredibly sick all. the. time. doesn't look so bad. But anyway, thank you for putting up with my little rant. I hope all of this will just go away, although I doubt it, but I can still hope!

Wayne's World! Party time! Excellent!

Introducing....

My new nephew WAYNE!

Born: 10.11.10

Weight: 9lbs 10oz

Welcome to the family!

The baby boy family basketball team is almost complete!

xoxoxo

Not going as I expected...

So here is the starting of the baby blanket I am attempting to crochet. I need to make 15 of the white squares, 8 of the blue ones, and 7 yellow. And they are supposed to be squares! They are looking pretty rectangular to me. eh.

I hope the white ones will turn out ok. They are supposed to have a star in them. Not sure if you can really see it or not....

As far as I know, I'm using the correct hook size and everything. Oh well. Not quite what i was expecting them to look like so far, but we'll see how it turns out once it's all put together. Then again, not too bad for not having crocheted anything in at least a few years. Keep your fingers crossed for me!

Just Over Half Way!

I am 22 weeks along now, almost 23. I have been really sick through this whole thing. I keep trying to stay positive about it, and try to remember that it will all be worth it in the end. Kollin has been such a great cheerleader for me, and supporting me when I'm feeling down. We have already done a bunch of shopping for baby clothes and what not. What do you expect from 2 of the worst shopaholics known to man? We've gotten some really cute stuff, but decided we should stop, cuz you never know what can come out of any baby showers that might be thrown.

These ones are my favorites so far... of course.

Kollin's dad has also sent us this very cute Scentsy for his room. awww!

I definitely have a baby belly now. Some people that have seen this picture say I have nothing, but I feel huge. But I also know I'm only going to be getting bigger as time goes on. I'm thinking that there is no hiding the fact that I've got a little boy bun in my oven now. But also, if you saw me, and didn't know what I looked like before I was preggers, you wouldn't really figure that I am yet. So weird.

Earlier this week I ended up needing to resign from my job since I haven't worked regularly since June. My FMLA ran out, so I didn't have anymore job protection. At least I was able to voluntarily resign, so I will be rehireable whenever I am ready to go back. Let's just hope that they will be hiring at that time! I loved my job, and hated to leave. With all this extra time I have doing absolutely nothing around the house, I've taken up crocheting again. Also among trying to keep the house clean, which I am not doing very good at since I can only get up and move around for about 5 or 10 minutes before I get really sick and need to lie down. I feel so guilty that Kollin is carrying the brunt of everything. ESPECIALLY since he got up early this morning (dude doesn't know how to sleep in), and cleaned the house while I was still snoozing in bed. Jerk. At least he just went down for a nap, and I'm going to try to finish up some of the cleaning he didn't get to.

Anyway, with the crochet, I have made my first pair of baby booties. They turned out pretty good for my first try in my opinion. I'll probably make a gazillion more before he gets here, so he most likely won't have an issue keeping his tootsies warm. I am also working on a baby blanket. It will hopefully turn out really cute. Lord knows that I have plenty of time to sit and work on it before he is here.

We were also able to see The Little Man at the zoo this week. It was really fun to see Kollin be with his son. Kollin gets so happy when he is with him, and has so much fun watching him.

Ok, so you can totally see my baby bump in this one! eek!

Stem or No Stem?

STEM! (it's a boy!)

Now I actually have proof that he's in there! And that he's a HE! Bring on the blue stuff!

Remembering our dear friend Sanjin.

Two years ago today, we lost our friend, son, grandson and loved one. It is difficult to believe that it has been two years already. We remember him as the tall, skinny Bosnian guy that was there for everyone whenever they needed him. He would give you the shirt off his back, or the hat off his head if asked. We all love you and miss you so much, and know you are in a better place now away from the hell of this earth. Raise a shot of Crown to our Sanjin. See you on the flip side! Volim Te Love, Mama, Grandma, Ali and Ali

Big News!

Oops... I've been slacking again. Sorry!

But there is some good news that we have been cooking up. We are pregnant! I am about 10 weeks along, and everything is going great so far!

More to come. :)

cant sleep. im not doing good. up at my mom's grave. it's 43 degrees. i miss her.