7 years.

I can't believe it has been 7 years.
Then again, I can.
I miss your smile.
I miss your laugh.
I miss your voice.
I miss your arms around me.
I miss snuggling with you.
I miss your beautiful hands.
I miss the freckle on your front tooth.
I miss your crazy hair.
I miss your matching birthmark to mine.
I miss your hot legs (I wish I had your legs and not the ones I got!).
I miss your cookies and candies.
I miss you always crunching on ice.
I miss startling you when I would walk into a room without warning (not usually on purpose!).
I miss your nervous twitch when you would "write" with your index finger.
I watch home videos, but they could never do you justice.
I cherish the clothing you made me as a child, and hope to be able to dress my future daughter in them someday.
I use your recipes to make your cookies and carmels, and cannot wait to teach my children the skills you taught me.
I look at your pictures often and remember how beautiful you are.
I see so much of you in my two beautiful sisters that share your genes.
I wish I could see some of you when I look in the mirror.
I know you are watching over me.
I know you are helping to hand pick my son and other future children to be sent to me someday.
I know you have work to do, and were not taken from us so early for no reason.
I know I will see you again someday.
I love you.


Callie said...

That was beautiful! I'm so thankful for the church to give us comfort knowing we will see our loved ones again some day soon. To your mom it will feel like she sent you out to play for lunch before she gets to see you again. I know it seems long here on earth but know she's taking care of other things now, like you said, your kids and anyone else you might have lost. Thanks for your post.

KickButtMommy said...

Beautiful Ali!

Elizabeth Dean said...

This is really beautiful, Ali. It brought tears to my eyes. Thank you for sharing with us the timeless memories you have of your mother. I'm so sorry for your pain and loss, but so happy that you have someone (and soon to be a new little one!) with whom you can keep those memories alive.

Miss ya girl, and congrats on all the baby news!

ashlea said...

This made me cry Ali! Simply beautiful! You are so lucky to have Alice for your mom! Being adopted myself I know how much your mom truly wanted you and loved you! It is so wonderful that even though we weren't in our mom's bellies we were able to be sealed to them for eternity and will be able to be reunited with them one day! Ali, I was really touched by your line, "I wish I could see some of you in myself when I look in the mirror." I know how you feel! I wish I could do the same with my mom! We are so lucky though that even though we don't look like our moms, we can look deeper into ourselves and find things that our mothers gave us that others wouldn't see in our looks. I know that your mom definitely passed onto you her sweet, happy personality, and infectious laugh! Thanks for your post! It was beautiful!

Natalie said...

So tender - totally made me cry!